what am i like as your doula? part one

Written By Tamara Niedermann

there are lots of doulas out there and it can be overwhelming to figure out which doula is the right one for you.⁣⁣

in an effort to help you decide if I’m the right doula I’m for you, here’s some info about me as a doula you might want to know.⁣

and yes, we’re gonna do this in a few parts because, i’m a *tad* long winded. ⁣

when you hire me, whether or not you hire me at six weeks pregnant or six months pregnant, we will have monthly appointments.

some of those will look like childbirth education. during those visits we’ll go through things like your birth plan, positioning, and comfort measures. some of those visits will be at coffee shops or tea houses. maybe we’ll walk lake eola or go to a prenatal yoga class. i’ll get to know you well, and meet whoever is going to be at your birth.⁣

⁣but why do i work this way? why don’t i limit myself to three prenatal visits? i mean, that’s the standard amount of visits for a doula, isn’t it? i could make more money if i only did three prenatals, since working with clients in this way requires me to give a lot of myself to each client and so i limit my availability to two births a month.⁣

⁣so why is it this important to me that i engage with my doula clients in this way?⁣

⁣well, because you might shit yourself in front of me.⁣
theres a good chance you’ll strip down naked in front of me.⁣
you will definitely cry in front of me.⁣

and to do those things in front of another person requires vulnerability. and vulnerability requires trust. and trust takes time to build. time and intention.

can you do those things in front of someone who you’ve only connected with three times? sure. but you may think twice and you might second guess your instincts.⁣

as your doula, i want to do everything within my power to create the kind of relationship that invites you to trust your instincts, but if you’re unsure or if you feel uncomfortable expressing yourself in the ways your body is leading you, then I’ve hindered the physiology of birth and become part of the problem.⁣

and i wanna be part of making birth better.⁣

xoxo

Tamara Niedermann

hi! i'm tamara, creator and owner of the kindred feminine. i have always known i am at my best when i was in support of the people around me. i surrounded myself with deep connections -- people who i could know and live life with. that desire for deep relationship is what has guided my journey to birth work, herbalism, and supporting the birthing and bleeding people in my community.

six years ago, when my younger sister and her husband started their parenting journey, she started sharing the things she was learning about pregnancy and labor. i watched documentaries with her. i read the books she recommended, and i realized that there was another way to birth your babies. until that point, the idea of home birth and midwives and doulas were sort of a joke. in movies and television they portray midwives as the hippy lady with incense and beads -- which to be fair that midwife exists and now i strive to be worthy of her -- but she's played as a joke. it took these books and documentaries, and new perspectives to show me that midwifery and doulas are legitimate callings, and home birth is a legitimate option.

simultaneous to my birth worker journey, i was coming into a better understanding of my womanhood and i wanted to have more holistic options for interacting with my fertility. so, i transitioned from hormonal birth control to the sympto-thermal method of fertility awareness to track my cycles, and then i switched out my single use menstrual products for reusables. both of these changes gave me a deeper knowledge of my cycles and my body

my growing love for fertility and body literacy combined with my heart for birthing and bleeding people and pregnancy, started me on this incredible journey of learning, and growth, and stewardship of the wisdom that has been passed to me.

the kindred feminine serves all birthing and bleeding people by supporting pregnant people prenatally, attending out of hospital births, and in the postpartum time. tamara teaches bodily autonomy through the fertility awareness method. i processes placentas, and makes herbal preparations including teas, baths, salves, and tinctures and elixirs.

i'm a bisexual cis woman who uses the pronouns she, hers, and her. i’m a newlywed in my early thirties. i'm the daughter of an immigrant single mother. i'm an advocate for fat positivity, body hair acceptance, lgbtq families, body literacy, and bodily autonomy for all people. i'm a birth keeper, and an herb

https://thekindredfeminine.com
Next

the fear response to unassisted birth (and the birth workers who attend them)